I was hired on with Intermountain Healthcare in December of 2004, making 2014 my 10 year mark. I can't believe it; time has gone so fast. I spent the first 6 months working as a generalist in the lab at the now-gone Cottonwood Hospital in the evening after my student rotation was done. It was a great way to meet people and become acquainted with the healthcare field.
After a couple of disappointing job applications, I took a chance and applied for a position in Transfusion Medicine at LDS Hospital. It was a courageous move: Transfusion Medicine techs kind of have a reputation of being a little, um, different, but only because in the world of Medical Laboratory Science, they have the most demanding (and if I may add, coolest) jobs there are. Even as I told my coworkers at Cottonwood that I had applied for this position, they looked at me like I was crazy.
But I loved Transfusion Medicine. It was the one area in school where I felt like I had excelled. It was definitely the area in my student rotations where I felt the most confident. And I loved the idea of doing something with my degree which didn't involve pushing buttons all day (my coworkers who read this will find it ironic that I have since become heavily involved in Transfusion automation.) So I applied for the position, secured an interview, and was offered the job a week later. It was the best feeling in the world.
It is a very demanding job and it is scary to know that a mistake on my part could cause someone real harm, but as I progressed through my training and moved onto 'the bench' I found that this position fit me like a glove! Literally: I feel like of any job in the whole world I could have, this was the absolute best fit. I still feel that way to this day. I am
so blessed. I honestly mean that.
I started working at LDS Hospital with the idea that in a few years I would transfer down to Intermountain Medical Center in Murray when it opened. I had no idea that I would become one of the trainers who would help train the new staff, nor would I know that I would suddenly go from being 'new girl' to 'experienced tech.' Seriously, in seniority in our department, there is only one person who is above me when it comes to Transfusion Medicine and even then she has only worked a few years longer than I have. When IMC opened I suddenly found myself in a position where people were looking to me as a leader and asking me questions that I wasn't even sure I had the answer to! It was very intimidating! In fact, I think it was probably the scariest part of my career because we were a brand new department in a brand new hospital and I kind of felt sometimes that we were a sinking ship and I was going down with it. But something really special happened, too. We became a close-knit family really fast and, to this day, the few of us who remain from the Original Team work very, very well together.
The transition all happened late in 2007--6 years later I consider myself part of one of the best departments this hospital doesn't know it has.
Which is why the following decision hasn't come easy to me at all.
When we were in Costa Rica last September I found myself with time to really think and decompress for, perhaps, the first time since Bean was born. It was in this time away from my work and home responsibilities that I realized just how burned out I was. It was at this time I realized that I couldn't work anymore, at least full-time. I think I knew in the back of my mind that this day had been coming, especially considering Bean will be starting real school this year (yikes!) and that, as lucky as S and I are to have jobs which make it so easy for me to work, something would have to be done about the days that his job and mine would overlap. But at this moment I realized that it wasn't even about logistics anymore. I needed to stop working for my sanity.
So I went and talked to possibly the best supervisor I've ever had (ironically too because she's only been here since early last year) and laid it all out on the table. I still wanted to work, but I couldn't work the hours I was being asked to right now. I wanted to keep my foot in the door but I needed to be home with my kids. I might have bawled the entire time. She's a very understanding supervisor.
The last 3 months have kind of been up in the air, but this department has been very accommodating and has given me the chance to work every other weekend and as a PRN the rest of the time (basically I'm here if they need me to come in.) It's a great schedule and I am very grateful.
My last week of work came and I made a schedule for some testing we do and it suddenly hit me--I wasn't on it! It was so bizarre. 9 years of the same thing, every other week, and then nothing. I am really excited for the opportunities that await for me being home with my kids more, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't really, really going to miss going to work. Now the nice thing about having my foot in the door is that, in case being home really doesn't work out, I'm technically not out of a job forever. And I'm sure that eventually I will return back to the workforce full time. But for the time being, I am going to be a SAHM that works every other weekend.
As this day has approached I've given a lot of thought to those things that I'm going to miss/not miss about being a working mom.
Things I Won't Miss:
- Babysitters: We only have to ask one of our moms to watch the kids 4-5 times a month, but it is exhausting to shuttle the kids around. Plus I usually sleep over with them and I just don't sleep as well if it's not in my own bed. It makes for really long work weeks.
- Commutes: I don't mind bad traffic but I HATE DRIVING IN SNOWSTORMS. I'm hoping that this will drastically reduce the number of times this has to happen.
- Eating reheated meals: I can't tell you the last time I had a freshly made casserole because it hasn't happened in a really long time. When I am home I make stuff that doesn't normally reheat well. I am going to make myself a nice, fresh plate of spaghetti one of these nights.
- Crappy work nights: Call me superstitious but there is a reason I don't complain when it's slow because it seems that work can go from being painfully slow to ridiculously busy in a matter of 10 minutes. I've worked some horrendous nights where, if it can go wrong, it will. I won't miss those nights at all.
- Having to say goodbye to Bean as often: Bean could care less that I was going to work up until about 6 months ago and since then she's had a really hard time telling me goodbye. Plus it will be nice to be home to put her to bed.
- Literally working half of my life: A week off at a time is a pretty amazing thing, but the downside is if something really important falls on my on week I have to trade a day to get it off or just miss whatever it is. I think it hit me recently that I literally miss half of my kids' dinnertimes and bathtimes and bedtimes.
- Coworkers: We, like any other family, can be dysfunctional and yes, there are some people I won't miss very much.
Things I Will Miss:
- Babysitters: Our moms have been amazing with our kids. They have a certain patience that S and I lack and I feel like Bean and Boy have more learning opportunities when they go to either of their Grandma's houses.
- Commutes: Get this: I have an hour a day of uninterrupted time in which I can listen to books or whatever music I want to. It's awesome and I'm really going to miss it.
- Eating meals by myself: They may be reheated, but at least it is nice and quiet and I can read a book or work on sewing or do Sudoku.
- Moving my car: I have to park far away when I get to work and so I usually take a 15 minute walking break to go move my car to a closer spot, since I leave so late at night. A guaranteed 15 minute walk every day I work means that, not only do I get a little more exercise in, but I get 15 minutes to clear my head.
- Prenatal testing: One of my job responsibilities is to test prenatal samples from doctor's offices throughout Salt Lake and Utah counties. We average 60-100 per weeknight. To some it is tedious work, but over the last 9 years I have fine-tuned my procedure and I have come to love the nights I am assigned to do prenatal testing. I love making order out of chaos.
- Antibody workups: Figuring out what is causing a patient's antibody screen to come up positive, to me, is like solving a puzzle. Sure, there are time I just want to overturn the table and watch the pieces scatter to the floor, but imagine having the most complex puzzle to solve and then actually solving it! It's highly gratifying!
- Coworkers: These people have become like a family and I will miss seeing my good friends that I've made and having conversations with other adults (even if sometimes we still act like we're still teenagers.)
Being away from my family so much, I feel, has really made me a better mom. I've said it before: taking that break allows me to appreciate the time I have with them more fully. Hopefully, my few days a month will still afford me this break! Also, I'm going to find ways to incorporate my work routines into my home life. Finally, I find it ironic that, just as I have time to actually contribute to crafty blog, 'My Week Off,' that I won't really have a week off anymore. But I'm still keeping the name. I am, after all, still a scientist at heart.
